How to have great relationships

I heard a woman say that she cannot wait to grow old so that she no longer has to consider other people. Then she could be as rude as she likes, do and say what she likes. If this is also your point of view, please understand that we are supposed to become better and not worse.

We are all bad, we all have the same sinful carnal fleshly nature. God’s plan for us is that we would die to the old nature and live in the Christ nature. We should become a new creation. We do this by renewing our minds and becoming a living sacrifice. Rom.12:1-2. In the same way Jesus laid down his fleshly nature, we lay down our sinful nature by doing what Jesus did. This is the only way we can become better people, by partaking in the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ.

The sinful nature is the reason why we have so many problems in the world. Partnerships hardly ever have a successful outcome because we never deal with our sinful nature but rather force it onto our partners. We expect people to accept us the way we are, we say: “All of my family members are impatient and ill-mannered!” That’s just ridiculous, that is not how we should treat others. They should become more and I less. That is what love is, love is a verb!

Years ago, a man wanted to be my partner in building our property. He was an elderly sincere gentleman. I asked him what a partner should be and he replied that a partner is someone you care more about than yourself. This was the attitude of Jesus who showed how we should love one another by washing his disciples’ feet. He said that we should be servants of all.

This subject of the sinful nature was on my mind as I listened to my children telling me how many marriages they have conducted and only one present of these couples remained married. I have listened to how they told of how the other person’s character changed completely and they had to divorce because of it. We are all subject to character changes if we are going to allow the sinful nature to take over our character. Our role model is Jesus. He showed how to die to the flesh and rise in the spirit. I remember that my wife and I were building a house by the coast and because we were by ourselves and working hard, I stopped using communion regularly. I eventually slipped into an uncharacteristic depression without realizing it. I remember laying in the bath tired, worn out, and depressed and Yvonne (My wife) served me communion right there in the bath as she prayed for me I was immediately out of depression. I learned a lesson I will never forget, just because you are not under attack from the outside world doesn’t mean that you are not under attack from your inside darkness.

 As I listened to the stories of failed relationships and partnerships, I started inquiring if they used communion, but it’s always something they forgot to do, the same as I did.

The only way to die to the flesh is by applying the blood of Jesus to the conscience. The conscience is the division between soul and spirit, or flesh and spirit.

We do introspection and ask the Holy Spirit to show us what sin is and deal with it at the cross. Pride, fear, depression, anxiety, despondency, and slothfulness to name only a few is sin in the heart. We deal with sin by following Jesus dying daily to the flesh and rising in the Spirit to rule over sin when we are in Christ. We help each other deal with sin when we help each other guard the heart.

There is no point in blaming the devil for failed relationships. The problem is always in us.

 We were a family of six children and the house was always full of people when I was small.

My mother was the spiritual one and she relied heavily on the power of the blood of Jesus. Whenever something went wrong in the family, I would hear my mother applying the blood of Jesus as she prayed. She did not even understand the blood, she simply used it and it never failed. Nothing bad ever happened to our family because of the blood of Jesus. It is the only way to deal with the sinful nature. Don’t let the spoilt sinful nature ruin your life. Deal with it at the cross.

Click here to download a free booklet, explaining how to use the cross daily and becoming Christ Minded.

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